The Last Two Years: An Update

Greetings! The last two years, I have removed myself from as much media as possible. My mom was in a severe car accident and suffered a brain injury. She needed assistance to get through each day. With my limited energy supply, I decided to disconnect from much of the outside world to focus my energy solely on my mom.

This time was a tremendous blessing. God showed me what it was to be an obedient servant. When I was tired and overwhelmed with exhaustion, the Lord reminded me of Jesus' sufferings on the cross. "He humbled Himself and became obedient unto death—even the death of the cross" (Philippians 2:8). I clung to this verse of scripture when I wanted to give up--when I wanted to curl up in bed and never move again. Jesus endured death on the cross--the most excruciating death known to man--for me. The least I can do is endure the fatigue and continue serving my mom as best I can.

As time progressed, I was thrilled to see my mom's progress. She grew stronger and stronger. About one year after the car accident, she started venturing away from home on her own. As she was able to do more and more for herself, I slipped away and spent more and more time in bed. My body was exhausted; the tremendous effort and energy I dedicated to helping her left its mark on my health. Muscles were weakened and some lost their function. My pancreas and GI tract continued causing challenges in my daily fight with food. My body's ability to produce a couple hormones has been greatly impaired. Despite all this, I am so grateful I was able to be of such service to my mom.

Over the next six months, I spent most of my time in bed--too tired, too weak--to do anything but sleep. It was a much needed vacation for my body. The last couple months, I have been slowly trying to do more things, but I am tired. I seem to sleep a lot, and my GI tract oscillates between bowel obstructions and pancreatitis attacks. The smallest task such putting water in a pot and turning on the stove, seems to really tire me out. Every day it is a tug of war between fatigue and sleep.

Overall, I am not sure how if my health is better or worse. Symptoms come and go. I am constantly changing my life to adapt to my body. For example, noise really bothers my ears. Last fall, I discovered wearing earplugs greatly helps me not become overwhelmed/overstimulated when I go places--church, grocery store, hospital. Before noise would cause me to develop painful muscle spasms and my heart would race out of control. Now, the earplugs block out enough sound that I can get in and out of a place quickly enough before my brain has a chance to become overwhelmed.

I hope everyone is well. Thank you so much for the love, support and prayers. It is such a blessing to have you in my life. "The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine upon you, and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up His countenance upon you, and give you peace." (Numbers 6:24-26)