Happy Bloggiversary!

Happy First Birthday to my blog! Wow! I cannot believe I have continued to write and post to this blog for one whole year! I also cannot believe how much my life has changed in this last year.

I know it is no coincidence that this anniversary date is on the very day I am traveling 400 miles to seek out one last ditch effort to find a cause for my breathing issues. I also know it is no coincidence that today is Tisha B'Av (the ninth day of the month of Av) on the Jewish calendar. This is the saddest day of the year for Jews. It is a day of great sorrow and fasting. Today is the day ten spies came back to Moses to report the land of Canaan was full of giants and was not a place for the Jews to dwell. God cursed the nation of Israel by making them wander in the wilderness for forty years until all the men 20 years and older died in the wilderness (Numbers 13-14). Since this time, God has continued to curse this day for the Jews. On the ninth of Av, the first temple was destroyed by Nebuchadnezzar. On the ninth of Av, the second temple was destroyed by the Romans. In 1290 on the ninth of Av, the Jews were expelled from England. On the ninth of Av in 1492, the Jews were exiled from Spain. Moreover, World War II and the Holocaust, historians conclude, was actually the long drawn-out conclusion of World War I that began in 1914. Germany declared war on Russia, effectively catapulting the First World War into motion, on the ninth of Av.

As I reflect back on all these tragedies, I cannot but hope that God will one day turn this day of fasting into a day of feasting. In Zechariah 8:19, God declares the following: "Thus says the LORD of hosts, 'The fast of the fourth, the fast of the fifth, the fast of the seventh and the fast of the tenth months will become joy, gladness and cheerful feasts for the house of Judah; so love truth and peace.'" (The month of Av is the fifth month on the Jewish calendar.)

Although I know this is a yet future promise God has made to the Jews, I cannot but pray that God will turn this ninth day of the month of Av into a day of gladness and joy for me. I am running out of energy to keep fighting for each breath. I am growing weaker and weaker each day. "Please, Lord, send wisdom and insight to my medical team. Please, Lord, provide a guiding light to reveal the cause of my breathing issues. Thank you for allowing me to share one year of my life on this blog. Thank You for allowing me to grow my faith and love for You more and more. Thank You for being by my side every day of my life. Amen."