These last few weeks, I have been really struggling--struggling to breathe, struggling to sleep, struggling to understand why I have been so sick. As I have been wallowing in my suffering, I have been determined to keep living my life as best as I can. Despite extreme sleep deprivation, I get up early on Sunday mornings to go to church. Throughout the week, I use what little energy I have to write blog posts and to write a weekly Bible study. I feel like these efforts are useless. Does anyone really care if I attend church? Does anyone really care if I do Bible study? As I have been in the depths of despair about the utility of my life, God has so graciously intervened with unexpected gifts.
The last couple weeks, I have received messages, emails and cards from many friends, some of whom I have not spoken to in quite some time. Always, their words have filled my heart with love and have brought tears to my eyes. The little things I have been forcing myself to do have been making a difference in other people's lives. Each word gives me hope and gives me courage to keep on keeping on. Although I know my health struggles will continue perhaps for the rest of my life, it is truly uplifting to know that God sees everything. And in His abundant goodness, He has sent numerous people into my life to let me know my efforts have helped others.
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