Please excuse my social faux pas

When I was a young child, my mom and I went to a Fourth of July parade in my hometown. It was filled with lots of music, fun floats, candy and regional dignitaries. After the parade, we met one of our local representatives. My mom had gone to school with the man and was very excited to introduce me to the representative. Upon introducing himself, the very nice man held out his right hand for a hand shake. I had a plastic bag filled with candy in my right hand. I thought for a brief second to put the bag of candy into my left hand, but then I decided to just shake with my left hand. After the representative left, my mom chastened me for making such a grave faux pas. “You ALWAYS shake with your right hand. Why didn’t you shake with your right hand? You embarrassed me! Do you know how embarrassing that was?” My mother was furious with me. Although the encounter was many, many years ago, I am always haunted by that memory.

This weekend at church, as I was about to leave, my pastor stretched out his right hand for a hand shake. I immediately knew I had to shake with my right hand; however, it was simply not possible. I was holding my ventilator heater and humidifier in my right hand. The device’s cord was wrapped around my right hand along with some of my ventilator tubing. My left hand was placed on top of my right hand to help stabilize the equipment. I quickly did a summary of the situation. If I attempted to switch everything from my right hand to my left hand, I very likely would drop the equipment, equipment which costs several hundred dollars. Moreover, I would probably injure myself when the device would fall off my lap and on to my feet. I quickly decided I would disobey my mother’s wishes from so long ago and shake using my left hand.

To my great relief, the hand shake came and went without lightening striking or the ceiling crashing down upon me. Moreover, the pastor did not even seem to be phased that I made such a gross social faux pas. I appreciated the hand shake and kind words from the pastor, but I was ever so relieved when I was able to be wheeled outside into the bright sunshine. The risk of having another person wanting to shake hands was over. I thanked God to have made it through another Sunday service. I thanked God after all these years, I still try to honor and obey my mom. And lastly, if you ever see me with my lap full of equipment and my hands tangled trying to hold on to everything, please just give me a pat on the back and avoid making me endure the stress of trying to shake hands. Thanks in advance!