It was a gorgeous weekend day many years ago, while I was attending university. I had a lot of studying to do, but I did not want to stay indoors. With the whole campus and beyond waiting just outside my dorm room door, I decided to pack up all my books and look for a place to study. Now, when I say I packed up all my books, I do mean I packed up ALL my books--my histology book, my histology atlas, my two biochemistry books, my 1500 page anatomy book, my 1280 page Gray's Anatomy textbook and of course pages and pages of class notes. With my backpack stuffed full to capacity, I set off to find my perfect study place.
As I was walking on campus, I headed toward one of the on-campus beaches. I remembered seeing a beautiful white-sand beach which was just a little ways away from campus. The beach was sequestered off from campus by a rocky cliff which jetted out into the water and separated the off-campus beach from the on-campus beach. No one ever seemed to venture to this secluded beach. I thought to myself, "What a great place to study!" And off I went.
When I arrived at the off-campus beach, I marveled that there was not a single person around. I slowly walked along the shore. I spotted a beautiful shaded area at the far end of the beach. "Perfect!" I thought. "This is going to be my studying sanctuary for the afternoon." As I approached the shaded area, I noticed in the midst of the grove of trees which lined the beach, there was a barbed-wire fence. And behind the face, there were about 75-100 cattle. I thought it was odd that there was a cattle ranch so close to the beach, but I pushed aside this anomaly and kept walking toward my intended destination. As I was nearing the shaded area, I noticed a young calf tied up with rope to a tree. As soon as the calf saw me, it started whining and squealing. Since the calf was tied up, I figured I was safe from the calf possibly attacking me. I continued walking. As I got closer to the calf, it started to squeal louder and louder and paced frantically back and forth.
Suddenly out of the corner of my eye, I saw something. Coming down a path made in between the trees, mama cow was bolting toward the beach! She was bellowing loudly like a ravening lion and stampeding right toward me! Now, mama cow was not an ordinary cow. She had two very long horns with very sharp points on their ends. She stood about 6-7 seven feet tall and could easily destroy a car if one happened to run into her. Mama cow was a brute beast. I knew I had to run for my life to avoid being trampled to death or possibly being gored to death by her long horns. In a split second, I turned around and started running toward campus. At this moment, I was lamenting for having taken ALL my textbooks with me to study. My book bag was incredibly heavy and was slamming into my back with each step I took. I thought to myself, "I know I could out run this beast, but these books are slowing me down. These books might yet be the end of me!"
As I was running, one of my sandals fell off. I quickly did a cost-benefit analysis. "Well, these sandals cost $40. They are my only pair of sandals I have here at university. I wear them almost every day. If I turn around and quickly backtrack to retrieve my sandal, I think I have enough of a lead on the cow to avoid being gored by the cow's horns." In an instant, I flipped around and started running the twenty feet back to my sandal. As I was slowing down to pick up my sandal, I kicked off my other sandal. I swooped down and grabbed both sandals with my right hand and immediately turned back around. I briefly looked behind me. The mama cow was so close! I could hear her snort as air rushed quickly in and out of her nostrils. I mustered up all my energy and ran with all my might toward the rocky cliff which separated the off-campus beach from the on-campus beach.
I was gaining some distance on the mama cow when a tremendous obstacle stood in my way. A stand of trees extended out from the grove of trees which lined the beach and reached out into the water. "Oh no! What am I going to do! The trees are a tangled mess. If I wished to stay on the beach, I will have to climb up and over the trees. I know mama cow will definitely catch me if I have to climb through the trees." So looking out to the water, I knew what I had to do. I dashed and splashed into the water. Thankfully, I only had to wade through about 3 feet of water, which kept my precious textbooks dry. A question ran through my mind, "Can cattle swim?" I immediately looked over my shoulder. To my astonishment, as the cow was nearing the stand of trees, she started running into the water! "Oy vey! I am in trouble!!!"
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