Having a chronic illness means that your health is always changing. Just when you get used to living a certain way, a symptom arises which alters the way you live. Of late, I have been trying to adjust to having respiratory muscle weakness.
In times past, I have learned that my heart rate and blood pressure are highest in the morning and gradually decrease throughout the day, with my heart rate and blood pressure being lowest from about midnight to 4 a.m. If I need to anything strenuous like bathing, it is best to reserve these activities until after 10 p.m. and preferably as close to midnight as possible. The earlier in the day I try to do things, the higher my heart rate and blood pressure, the more symptomatic I become, the more energy I expend, and the longer it takes my body to recover. However, this way of living has now changed.
After being able to rest during the night, my respiratory muscles are strongest in the morning (around 9-11 a.m.). As the day progresses, my respiratory muscles become more and more fatigued. By 4 p.m., my respiratory muscles burn with exhaustion. If I try to push myself to do things in the evening, my respiratory muscles become very weak to the point where all my energy and focus is on using my abdominal muscles to breathe. I then sleep poorly due to high carbon dioxide levels which build up in my blood from not being able to breathe deeply. The next couple days are then spent recovering from respiratory exhaustion.
So now, I am trying to figure out how to best live with high blood pressure and heart rate in the mornings combined with my body's best ability to breathe in the morning. I am trying to do more things earlier in the day when breathing is easier. But as my latest heart rate monitor shows, mornings are a time when my heart rate likes to sky rocket to 150 beats per minute, which causes severe chest pain and fatigue to develop. So I am constantly trying new routines and new ways of doing things. Thankfully, when a new challenge arises, God always provides me with a way to figure it out. "I will lift up my eyes to the hills--from where will my help come? My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth" (Psalm 121:1-2).
Saturday, April 29, 2017
Thursday, April 27, 2017
It's like holding your breath under water
The other day, as I was in the kitchen eating lunch, I suddenly had an "aha!" moment. As the carbon dioxide builds up in my blood, I have been trying to figure out a way to describe the sensation. Suddenly the image of holding one's breath under water came to mind. "Exactly! That is exactly how it feels when carbon dioxide is building up in my blood." When you first start holding your breath under water, you are a bit apprehensive, but you try to remain calm. As the seconds tick by, you start growing agitated and panic starts setting in. Soon, you begin to become light-headed, a headache develops, your thinking becomes cloudy and feel you the need that you have to breathe right now or you are going to die!
That is pretty much what it feels like when I disconnect from my ventilator. (Since my respiratory muscles are weak, I am only able to inflate my lungs a little bit on my own. Since exhalation is passive and depends on the amount a person can inhale, I am able to exhale very little. Thus without the use of a ventilator, carbon dioxide starts building up in my body.) At first, the symptoms are not bad, but they continue to grow worse and worse. I often feel panicked and tell myself to stop holding my breath. (I am not actually holding my breath, but my breathing is so shallow, it feels like I am holding my breath.) When I can tolerate the symptoms no longer, I hook back up to the ventilator. I wish hooking back up to the ventilator would be like when you break through the water and gulp a big breath of air. Oh the refreshing joy and relief those first few breaths bring to your body! Unfortunately, when I breathe using the ventilator, my symptoms do not go away right away. I must patiently wait 1-2 hours before the symptoms lessen. Even at that, the symptoms never completely go away...but I am very grateful for the ventilator and for the improvement of my symptoms over time.
"The Spirit of God has made me, and the breath of the Almighty gives me life" (Job 33:4).
That is pretty much what it feels like when I disconnect from my ventilator. (Since my respiratory muscles are weak, I am only able to inflate my lungs a little bit on my own. Since exhalation is passive and depends on the amount a person can inhale, I am able to exhale very little. Thus without the use of a ventilator, carbon dioxide starts building up in my body.) At first, the symptoms are not bad, but they continue to grow worse and worse. I often feel panicked and tell myself to stop holding my breath. (I am not actually holding my breath, but my breathing is so shallow, it feels like I am holding my breath.) When I can tolerate the symptoms no longer, I hook back up to the ventilator. I wish hooking back up to the ventilator would be like when you break through the water and gulp a big breath of air. Oh the refreshing joy and relief those first few breaths bring to your body! Unfortunately, when I breathe using the ventilator, my symptoms do not go away right away. I must patiently wait 1-2 hours before the symptoms lessen. Even at that, the symptoms never completely go away...but I am very grateful for the ventilator and for the improvement of my symptoms over time.
"The Spirit of God has made me, and the breath of the Almighty gives me life" (Job 33:4).
Monday, April 24, 2017
Yom HaShoah: May we never forget
When I was a youngster, I had several opportunities to visit Washington, D.C. One of my favorite places to visit was the Holocaust Museum. People all around me often were somber with tears running down their cheeks. I, however, never found the museum to elicit tears from my eyes. I was fascinated with all the artifacts. To gaze upon a large mound of eyeglasses and a massive pile of shoes taken from concentration camp detainees seemed incredible. Here were actual things from the Holocaust.
When I was a bit older, I had the opportunity to visit Denmark and the Netherlands. Both these countries have fascinating museums about their respective resistance movements. As I moved through these museums, I was filled with great hope and even joy after reading about incredible acts of defiance and amazing rescue missions. "Way to go! Way to outwit the Nazis!"
A year later, I had the opportunity to visit Mauthausen concentration camp in Austria. Again, a sense of fascination took hold of me. I had read countless books about people surviving the concentration camps, and it was surreal to be visiting the camp. I was even excited when I saw the 186 stairs of death which led from the quarry up to the concentration camp. I had read about these stairs--hundreds perhaps thousands of people died on these steps. Some died when their feet slipped and they fell to their death; others perished when the tremendous weight of the quarry stones they had to carry was too much for the person, and they were crushed when their body collapsed from fatigue. As I viewed each section of the camp, nothing seemed to make me sad.
The very last place I visited was an oven in the crematorium. Around the oven, there were name plaques with people who had perished there along with where they were from. I gazed from plaque to plaque. My eye was drawn to a plaque which had freshly cut flowers arranged in a vase. I cannot remember the man's name, but I distinctly remember he was from Las Vegas, Nevada. Immediately my eyes filled with tears. After reading countless stories about people surviving the Holocaust, they were always from distant places such as Germany, Poland and Hungary. No one ever was from the USA...and perhaps this fact always isolated me from feeling any connection to the Holocaust. Now, as I gazed at the plaque which read Las Vegas, Nevada, the Holocaust suddenly became very real. As I studied the flowers, I realized they were freshly placed there. I frantically searched the people around me. Was this man's family here? Another wave of grief took hold of me as I reflected that this man's family was still alive and still mourned his death. Here I am halfway around the world and there are people from my own country still grieving the loss of their loved ones killed in the Holocaust.
So, today, as Israel and Jews from around the world mark this day--the anniversary date of the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising--as a day to mourn the loss of those killed in the Holocaust, let us also not forget. Let us not forget the 6 million Jews killed, the millions of others killed from around the world, and those still mourning the death of their loved ones. May peace fill your hearts and minds.
Lord of Peace, Divine Ruler, to whom peace belongs. Master of Peace, Creator of all things. May it be Thy will to put an end to war and bloodshed on earth, and to spread a great and wonderful peace over the whole world, so that nation shall not lift up sword against nation, neither shall they learn war anymore. Help us and save us all, and let us cling tightly to the virtue of peace. Let there be a truly great peace between every person and their fellow, and between husband and wife, and let there be no discord between people even in their hearts. Let us never shame any person on earth, great or small. May it be granted unto us to fulfill Thy commandments to "Love thy neighbor as thyself", with all our hearts and souls and bodies and possessions. God who is peace, bless us with peace.
-Rabbi Nachman ben Feiga of Breslov, 1773-1810
When I was a bit older, I had the opportunity to visit Denmark and the Netherlands. Both these countries have fascinating museums about their respective resistance movements. As I moved through these museums, I was filled with great hope and even joy after reading about incredible acts of defiance and amazing rescue missions. "Way to go! Way to outwit the Nazis!"
A year later, I had the opportunity to visit Mauthausen concentration camp in Austria. Again, a sense of fascination took hold of me. I had read countless books about people surviving the concentration camps, and it was surreal to be visiting the camp. I was even excited when I saw the 186 stairs of death which led from the quarry up to the concentration camp. I had read about these stairs--hundreds perhaps thousands of people died on these steps. Some died when their feet slipped and they fell to their death; others perished when the tremendous weight of the quarry stones they had to carry was too much for the person, and they were crushed when their body collapsed from fatigue. As I viewed each section of the camp, nothing seemed to make me sad.
The very last place I visited was an oven in the crematorium. Around the oven, there were name plaques with people who had perished there along with where they were from. I gazed from plaque to plaque. My eye was drawn to a plaque which had freshly cut flowers arranged in a vase. I cannot remember the man's name, but I distinctly remember he was from Las Vegas, Nevada. Immediately my eyes filled with tears. After reading countless stories about people surviving the Holocaust, they were always from distant places such as Germany, Poland and Hungary. No one ever was from the USA...and perhaps this fact always isolated me from feeling any connection to the Holocaust. Now, as I gazed at the plaque which read Las Vegas, Nevada, the Holocaust suddenly became very real. As I studied the flowers, I realized they were freshly placed there. I frantically searched the people around me. Was this man's family here? Another wave of grief took hold of me as I reflected that this man's family was still alive and still mourned his death. Here I am halfway around the world and there are people from my own country still grieving the loss of their loved ones killed in the Holocaust.
So, today, as Israel and Jews from around the world mark this day--the anniversary date of the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising--as a day to mourn the loss of those killed in the Holocaust, let us also not forget. Let us not forget the 6 million Jews killed, the millions of others killed from around the world, and those still mourning the death of their loved ones. May peace fill your hearts and minds.
Lord of Peace, Divine Ruler, to whom peace belongs. Master of Peace, Creator of all things. May it be Thy will to put an end to war and bloodshed on earth, and to spread a great and wonderful peace over the whole world, so that nation shall not lift up sword against nation, neither shall they learn war anymore. Help us and save us all, and let us cling tightly to the virtue of peace. Let there be a truly great peace between every person and their fellow, and between husband and wife, and let there be no discord between people even in their hearts. Let us never shame any person on earth, great or small. May it be granted unto us to fulfill Thy commandments to "Love thy neighbor as thyself", with all our hearts and souls and bodies and possessions. God who is peace, bless us with peace.
-Rabbi Nachman ben Feiga of Breslov, 1773-1810
Thursday, April 20, 2017
Grocery Market Miracles
When I was in high school, I worked at a local grocery store. One day while I was cashiering, I noticed the guy bagging the groceries at my register stopped working. His eyes were fixated on a tiny crystal rock which was on the counter area where the rung up groceries were pushed down to be bagged. Very carefully using two fingers, the boy gently picked us this very small crystal. He then asked the customer, "Ma'am, is this your diamond?" (I nearly started laughing. I thought, "Yeah, right! That wasn't a diamond. It probably was a kosher salt granule.")
Upon hearing these words and seeing the tiny stone in the bagger's hand, the woman exclaimed, "My diamond!!! Where did you find it!? Several days ago, I noticed the diamond in my wedding ring fell out. I looked everywhere for it but was not able to find it. Oh, my diamond!" The bagger explained he saw it on the end of the checkout counter. The woman wanted to pay the bagger for his find, but the guy humbly refused. He said he was just glad he saw the diamond and was able to give it back to her.
While growing up, my brother also worked at the same grocery store. One day while he was working at the store crushing boxes and throwing them into the dumpster, his gold necklace broke. He gratefully scooped up the gold necklace, but he panicked because he could find the gold cross pendant which hung from the necklace. The necklace meant a lot to my brother because he had picked it out with my grandmother for his church confirmation gift. He searched and searched in the dumpster and all around. Finally, without finding the pendant, he tearfully gave up the search.
Several days later, I was sitting in our home living room. I suddenly noticed a small half inch golden fleck on our golden brown carpeting. I got up from the recliner to walk over and examine it. "Oh my!" I exclaimed when I realized it was my brother's cross pendant from his necklace. I immediately found my brother and with much joy and delight gave him the golden cross pendant.
I smile when I think about these grocery store miracles. Both items were found several days after they were lost. The diamond was lost at home and discovered at the grocery store while the necklace pendant was lost at the grocery store and found at home. The lost diamond reminds me of Jesus' parable of the lost coin: "What woman having ten pieces of silver, if she lose one piece, does not light a candle, and sweep the house, and seek diligently till she find it? And when she has found it, she calls her friends and her neighbors together saying, 'Rejoice with me, for I found the piece which I had lost.' Likewise, I say unto you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner that repents" (Luke 15:8-10). The lost cross pendant reminds me of Jesus' death and resurrection. After Jesus died on the cross, He was buried. After three days of being hidden away in the grave, He reappeared to those who loved Him. I pray heaven has been able to rejoice when you repent of your sins; I pray you have trusted Jesus to be your Lord and Savior.
Upon hearing these words and seeing the tiny stone in the bagger's hand, the woman exclaimed, "My diamond!!! Where did you find it!? Several days ago, I noticed the diamond in my wedding ring fell out. I looked everywhere for it but was not able to find it. Oh, my diamond!" The bagger explained he saw it on the end of the checkout counter. The woman wanted to pay the bagger for his find, but the guy humbly refused. He said he was just glad he saw the diamond and was able to give it back to her.
While growing up, my brother also worked at the same grocery store. One day while he was working at the store crushing boxes and throwing them into the dumpster, his gold necklace broke. He gratefully scooped up the gold necklace, but he panicked because he could find the gold cross pendant which hung from the necklace. The necklace meant a lot to my brother because he had picked it out with my grandmother for his church confirmation gift. He searched and searched in the dumpster and all around. Finally, without finding the pendant, he tearfully gave up the search.
Several days later, I was sitting in our home living room. I suddenly noticed a small half inch golden fleck on our golden brown carpeting. I got up from the recliner to walk over and examine it. "Oh my!" I exclaimed when I realized it was my brother's cross pendant from his necklace. I immediately found my brother and with much joy and delight gave him the golden cross pendant.
I smile when I think about these grocery store miracles. Both items were found several days after they were lost. The diamond was lost at home and discovered at the grocery store while the necklace pendant was lost at the grocery store and found at home. The lost diamond reminds me of Jesus' parable of the lost coin: "What woman having ten pieces of silver, if she lose one piece, does not light a candle, and sweep the house, and seek diligently till she find it? And when she has found it, she calls her friends and her neighbors together saying, 'Rejoice with me, for I found the piece which I had lost.' Likewise, I say unto you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner that repents" (Luke 15:8-10). The lost cross pendant reminds me of Jesus' death and resurrection. After Jesus died on the cross, He was buried. After three days of being hidden away in the grave, He reappeared to those who loved Him. I pray heaven has been able to rejoice when you repent of your sins; I pray you have trusted Jesus to be your Lord and Savior.
Wednesday, April 19, 2017
Staring at the wall
So lost...so tired...so short of breath. The last couple weeks, my health has been greatly challenging me. My respiratory muscles are growing noticeably weaker, and the rest of the muscles in my body groan with fatigue and pain. I watch my ventilator as it tells me while lying down, I take 25-30 breaths per minute. Upon sitting, my breaths increase to 30-40 per minute. If I leave my bed to sit or move about, my breathing increases to 60-85 breaths per minute. It takes a great effort to breathe. My chest and abdomen strain with effort to inhale. Although my body is gripped in a tight vice of fatigue, my breathing often remains too rapid to allow my body to drift off to sleep.
I patiently waited for my doctor's appointment with my pulmonologist this week. My one ray of hope that something could be done to lessen the energy and effort my body is exerting to keep me breathing. Unfortunately, the appointment came and went and nothing happened. I did pulmonary lung function tests which revealed my respiratory muscles are severely weakened. But, the doctor just said to follow up in a month. When I tried to make a follow up appointment, I was informed the doctor's next available appointment is in two months. My heart sank, and my eyes filled with tears. I have fought so hard to make it through the last two weeks...two more months of waiting seems like an eternity. How much more fatigue can my respiratory muscles endure?
I have tried to seek out specialists in the field of neuromuscular disease. One facility there is a nine month wait; another medical center it is a six month wait. So, here I am lying motionless, staring at the wall, praying God will direct my steps. "Lord, I am tired. Lord, hear my prayer. Please move mountains and make my way level before me. Please lessen my suffering. Please give me strength, energy and hope as I patiently wait for You. Lord, allow me to glorify You through this all. Amen."
I patiently waited for my doctor's appointment with my pulmonologist this week. My one ray of hope that something could be done to lessen the energy and effort my body is exerting to keep me breathing. Unfortunately, the appointment came and went and nothing happened. I did pulmonary lung function tests which revealed my respiratory muscles are severely weakened. But, the doctor just said to follow up in a month. When I tried to make a follow up appointment, I was informed the doctor's next available appointment is in two months. My heart sank, and my eyes filled with tears. I have fought so hard to make it through the last two weeks...two more months of waiting seems like an eternity. How much more fatigue can my respiratory muscles endure?
I have tried to seek out specialists in the field of neuromuscular disease. One facility there is a nine month wait; another medical center it is a six month wait. So, here I am lying motionless, staring at the wall, praying God will direct my steps. "Lord, I am tired. Lord, hear my prayer. Please move mountains and make my way level before me. Please lessen my suffering. Please give me strength, energy and hope as I patiently wait for You. Lord, allow me to glorify You through this all. Amen."
Wednesday, April 12, 2017
Oh my precious Mary! Praise be to God!
In 2013, tradegy struck my town. A three and a half year old little girl was struck and killed by a car. The little girl's mother watched in horror, screaming for her child to stop. But that day, the little girl went Home to be with her Lord and Savior. I was devastated to learn that I knew the little girl's mom, Mary. Mary and I grew up together--school, Girl Scouts and athletics. After graduating high school we each went our own ways, and we lost contact.
Being terribly grieved for my friend, I attended the little girl's funeral. After so many years, Mary and I briefly reconnected. But Mary was in such a state of shock; it greatly burdened my heart to see her so grief stricken. Ever since that encounter, I have prayed for Mary. I have prayed she would find joy; I prayed God would bless her with another child.
Today, I suddenly remembered another friend whose brother has been sick in ICU with blood clots. I hopped on Facebook to check to see if she had any updates. As I was reading her post, I happened to see Mary had left a reply. "Mary! Sweet Mary! I wonder how she is doing?" So, I clicked on Mary's name leading me to her Facebook page. (Praise be to God, although Mary and I are not friends on Facebook, I could still see some of her posts and photos.) I wept as I read a message that her little girl was now in heaven with her daddy. Oh, how tragic! I did know that Mary's husband had died prior to the death of her little girl. I cannot imagine the grief and sorrow Mary must have endured in such a short time frame.
My heart was filled with praises to God as I saw that God had blessed Mary with a little boy in 2015. To see a smile on Mary's face brought tears of joy to my eyes. A tremendous sense of peace has filled my soul. After praying for Mary for so many years, it is such a joy and blessing to know prayers have been answered. "Oh Lord, thank You for hearing all my prayers. Thank You for blessing Mary with another child. Thank You for allowing joy and happiness to return to Mary's life! Please Lord protect Mary and her family. Please allow their lives to be filled Your love. Thank You for Your abundant blessings. Amen."
Monday, April 10, 2017
Happy Passover...the saddest day of my year
Since I was a child, this time of year always filled me with great sorrow. People all around me were always filled with great excitement, but I often wondered how folks could be excited that Jesus, our Lord and Savior, was crucified almost two thousand years ago. Did they not love Jesus? Did they not care that He innocently died the most painful death known to man? How could folks find so much joy in Jesus' death?
As a child, I would run away and hide whenever I saw a cross with Jesus hanging on it. The image made me terribly sad. As a teenager, my church youth group attended a stations of the cross event, a play which consisted of 14 stations which depicted the events leading up to and including the death of Jesus. I deeply wanted to be able to attend this event as so many people at my church talked enthusiastically about the play. After about three or four stations, I bolted from the event. I escaped to my car and sobbed uncontrollably. How could anyone want to witness the tragic events which killed my Lord and Savior?
As an adult, I have continued to try to embrace this time of year. I have faithfully attended many Lenten, Maundy Thursday and Good Friday services. Almost every service, I firmly gripped the pew in front of me and force myself to stay through the time of worship...but oh how my heart aches during these services, and my eyes well up with tears!
As I read through the Bible, whenever I come to the events leading up to and including Jesus' crucifixion, I read over these verses as quickly as possible; yet, tears often stream down my face. Although these parts of Scripture are tremendously sorrowful, I endure reading these parts of Scripture for the tremendous joy and comfort which comes three days after Jesus' death, on the morning of the Feast of First Fruits. "But Mary was standing outside the tomb weeping; and so, as she wept, she stooped and looked into the tomb; and she saw two angels in white sitting, one at the head and one at the feet, where the body of Jesus had been lying. And they said to her, 'Woman, why are you weeping?' She said to them, 'Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him.' And when she said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, and did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to her, 'Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?' Supposing Him to be the gardener, she said to Him, 'Sir, if you have carried Him away, tell me where you have laid Him and I will take Him away.' Jesus said to her, 'Mary!' She turned and said to Him in Hebrew, 'Rabboni!' (which mean, Teacher). Jesus said to her, 'Stop clinging to Me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father; but go to My brethren and say to them, "I ascend to My Father and your Father, and My God and your God"'" (John 20:11-17).
So, as painful as it is for me to endure another year, another Passover commemorating the death of Jesus the Messiah, it is of great joy to know that He lives! Jesus conquered death. He died on the cross to allow all those who choose to believe in Him to escape eternal punishment and enjoy everlasting life. Jesus endured the most horrendous, painful death to give you and me life! What an incredible gift! So as much as my heart sorrows for Jesus' death, I must take comfort in knowing His death gives me eternal life. "Give thanks to the LORD, for He is good, for His lovingkindness is everlasting" (Psalm 136:1).
As a child, I would run away and hide whenever I saw a cross with Jesus hanging on it. The image made me terribly sad. As a teenager, my church youth group attended a stations of the cross event, a play which consisted of 14 stations which depicted the events leading up to and including the death of Jesus. I deeply wanted to be able to attend this event as so many people at my church talked enthusiastically about the play. After about three or four stations, I bolted from the event. I escaped to my car and sobbed uncontrollably. How could anyone want to witness the tragic events which killed my Lord and Savior?
As an adult, I have continued to try to embrace this time of year. I have faithfully attended many Lenten, Maundy Thursday and Good Friday services. Almost every service, I firmly gripped the pew in front of me and force myself to stay through the time of worship...but oh how my heart aches during these services, and my eyes well up with tears!
As I read through the Bible, whenever I come to the events leading up to and including Jesus' crucifixion, I read over these verses as quickly as possible; yet, tears often stream down my face. Although these parts of Scripture are tremendously sorrowful, I endure reading these parts of Scripture for the tremendous joy and comfort which comes three days after Jesus' death, on the morning of the Feast of First Fruits. "But Mary was standing outside the tomb weeping; and so, as she wept, she stooped and looked into the tomb; and she saw two angels in white sitting, one at the head and one at the feet, where the body of Jesus had been lying. And they said to her, 'Woman, why are you weeping?' She said to them, 'Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him.' And when she said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, and did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to her, 'Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?' Supposing Him to be the gardener, she said to Him, 'Sir, if you have carried Him away, tell me where you have laid Him and I will take Him away.' Jesus said to her, 'Mary!' She turned and said to Him in Hebrew, 'Rabboni!' (which mean, Teacher). Jesus said to her, 'Stop clinging to Me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father; but go to My brethren and say to them, "I ascend to My Father and your Father, and My God and your God"'" (John 20:11-17).
So, as painful as it is for me to endure another year, another Passover commemorating the death of Jesus the Messiah, it is of great joy to know that He lives! Jesus conquered death. He died on the cross to allow all those who choose to believe in Him to escape eternal punishment and enjoy everlasting life. Jesus endured the most horrendous, painful death to give you and me life! What an incredible gift! So as much as my heart sorrows for Jesus' death, I must take comfort in knowing His death gives me eternal life. "Give thanks to the LORD, for He is good, for His lovingkindness is everlasting" (Psalm 136:1).
Friday, April 7, 2017
Passover is soon to be here!!!
With less than 72 hours before Jews and Christians around the world start celebrating Passover, I have been reflecting back on this important feast. In the book of Exodus, the Israelites are told to sacrifice a lamb and place the blood of the animal on the doorposts of their dwellings. During the night, any dwelling which did not have the blood of the lamb painted on its doorposts, the angel of death killed all first born humans and animals. It was by faith, the Israelites obeyed this commandment; it was by faith that they escaped the angel of death. In the morning, the Israelites fled as fugitives from Egypt, a land of slavery and bondage. Through faith, they followed Moses through the Red Sea toward their inheritance--the promised land of Israel. Each year, Jews commemorate Passover by eating the Seder meal. Each year, they patiently wait for the return of Messiah.
As Christians, the ultimate fulfillment of this feast happened when Jesus the Messiah became the sacrificial Passover lamb 2000 years ago. Jesus, dying on the cross, allows us to use His blood to cover our sins. Like the blood smeared on the Israelite doors posts which created the letter "chet" meaning "to life", if we accept Jesus' blood to cover our sins, He promises us eternal life. We are strangers in this land, patiently sojourning in a land which is not our own. If we believe in Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we will also possess our inheritance in the times to come--a new heavens and a new earth. ("Then I saw 'a new heaven and a new earth,' for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Look! God's dwelling place is now among the people, and He will dwell with them. They will be His people, and God Himself will be their God" (Revelation 21:1-3).)
So tonight, as Jews and Christians prepare their hearts and minds for the coming Passover, may we pray for all those who are still waiting for Messiah. May we pray for all the lost souls slaves to sin, the burden of which is too heavy to bare. May they find their way out of bondage and into the Light; may they find their hope and joy in Jesus. May they find rest for their weary bodies and take the words of Jesus to heart, for He says, "Come unto me all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me; for I am meek and lowly in heart, and you shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light," (Matthew 11:28-30). Shabbat Shalom!
As Christians, the ultimate fulfillment of this feast happened when Jesus the Messiah became the sacrificial Passover lamb 2000 years ago. Jesus, dying on the cross, allows us to use His blood to cover our sins. Like the blood smeared on the Israelite doors posts which created the letter "chet" meaning "to life", if we accept Jesus' blood to cover our sins, He promises us eternal life. We are strangers in this land, patiently sojourning in a land which is not our own. If we believe in Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we will also possess our inheritance in the times to come--a new heavens and a new earth. ("Then I saw 'a new heaven and a new earth,' for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Look! God's dwelling place is now among the people, and He will dwell with them. They will be His people, and God Himself will be their God" (Revelation 21:1-3).)
So tonight, as Jews and Christians prepare their hearts and minds for the coming Passover, may we pray for all those who are still waiting for Messiah. May we pray for all the lost souls slaves to sin, the burden of which is too heavy to bare. May they find their way out of bondage and into the Light; may they find their hope and joy in Jesus. May they find rest for their weary bodies and take the words of Jesus to heart, for He says, "Come unto me all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me; for I am meek and lowly in heart, and you shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light," (Matthew 11:28-30). Shabbat Shalom!
Tuesday, April 4, 2017
Rejoice in the Lord always!
It is often easy to become overwhelmed with one's challenges in life. From personality conflicts in the workplace to losing a dear companion, each obstacle presents us with the ability to either be disgruntle or grateful.
As the years of my health trials have passed by, I have come to a new appreciation for so many bodily functions. After several years of having my GI tract constantly shut down, I marvel at my body's ability to go #2. (Yes, I often praise God for the incredible ability to poop because it truly is a blessing to be able to go!) After enduring countless pancreatitis attacks, I am amazed how much my body needs and relies on a functioning pancreas to digest food. Each bite of food I am able to digest is truly a miracle!
One of the newest areas of my life in which I am giving gratitude to God is breathing. This is one part of my body I have never thought much about. How many times a day do we breathe in and out? How many times a day do we think about this simple action? As of late, breathing is constantly on my mind. Moreover, I have been introduced to a new challenge--breathing and eating. This task has become very burdensome. If I want to eat, I have to take off my mask which pumps high pressure air into my lungs, allowing me to breathe without exerting tremendous effort. Often, I can only eat a little bit of food and then have to hook back up to the ventilator for an hour or two before I have the energy to attempt to disconnect from the ventilator to eat again. Although it can be very frustrating trying to manage feeding my tummy with filling my lungs with air, it is another reason to glorify God. How precious it is to be able to eat. How precious is it to be able to breathe. How precious this life is! "LORD, make me to know my end, and the measure of my days, what it is; that I may know how frail I am. Behold, You have made my days as a handbreadth; and my age is as nothing before You. Surely every man at his best is a mere breath" (Psalm 39:4-5).
As the years of my health trials have passed by, I have come to a new appreciation for so many bodily functions. After several years of having my GI tract constantly shut down, I marvel at my body's ability to go #2. (Yes, I often praise God for the incredible ability to poop because it truly is a blessing to be able to go!) After enduring countless pancreatitis attacks, I am amazed how much my body needs and relies on a functioning pancreas to digest food. Each bite of food I am able to digest is truly a miracle!
One of the newest areas of my life in which I am giving gratitude to God is breathing. This is one part of my body I have never thought much about. How many times a day do we breathe in and out? How many times a day do we think about this simple action? As of late, breathing is constantly on my mind. Moreover, I have been introduced to a new challenge--breathing and eating. This task has become very burdensome. If I want to eat, I have to take off my mask which pumps high pressure air into my lungs, allowing me to breathe without exerting tremendous effort. Often, I can only eat a little bit of food and then have to hook back up to the ventilator for an hour or two before I have the energy to attempt to disconnect from the ventilator to eat again. Although it can be very frustrating trying to manage feeding my tummy with filling my lungs with air, it is another reason to glorify God. How precious it is to be able to eat. How precious is it to be able to breathe. How precious this life is! "LORD, make me to know my end, and the measure of my days, what it is; that I may know how frail I am. Behold, You have made my days as a handbreadth; and my age is as nothing before You. Surely every man at his best is a mere breath" (Psalm 39:4-5).
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