Infrequently in my life, I am invited to attend social gatherings. The reasons for the lack of invitations vary from people not knowing how to accommodate my medical needs to people forgetting to inform me of the event. When I am asked to go to a gathering, it is always a tug-of-war inside me.
My immediate response to any invitation is “YES!” But then my rational self interjects and reminds the rest of my brain I have little energy. I need to see when the event falls in my schedule. If I have a medical appointment or need to get blood work done on the same day or on a day adjacent to the social, then I have to decline to attend.
But what about a gathering which does not interfere with anything else on my schedule? Then another battle erupts in which I have to weigh the pros and cons of going. How long will the event be? Will there be electrical outlets available to plug in my ventilator and heater/humidifier? How far do I have to travel to the event? Will it be noisy? How many people will be present? And the list of questions goes on and on.
I often wish my life was simpler. Before becoming significantly ill, if I was asked to go to a social, the question swirling in my head would not be if I should go, but what should I wear. I miss my old life and the ease of going anywhere on a moment’s notice. Life with chronic illness is hard, and it often times drains the fun from attending events.
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