The Struggle: To Attend or Not Attend

Infrequently in my life, I am invited to attend social gatherings. The reasons for the lack of invitations vary from people not knowing how to accommodate my medical needs to people forgetting to inform me of the event. When I am asked to go to a gathering, it is always a tug-of-war inside me.

My immediate response to any invitation is “YES!” But then my rational self interjects and reminds the rest of my brain I have little energy. I need to see when the event falls in my schedule. If I have a medical appointment or need to get blood work done on the same day or on a day adjacent to the social, then I have to decline to attend.

But what about a gathering which does not interfere with anything else on my schedule? Then another battle erupts in which I have to weigh the pros and cons of going. How long will the event be? Will there be electrical outlets available to plug in my ventilator and heater/humidifier? How far do I have to travel to the event? Will it be noisy? How many people will be present? And the list of questions goes on and on.

I often wish my life was simpler. Before becoming significantly ill, if I was asked to go to a social, the question swirling in my head would not be if I should go, but what should I wear. I miss my old life and the ease of going anywhere on a moment’s notice. Life with chronic illness is hard, and it often times drains the fun from attending events.

Proactively Walk Out Your Faith

During the last several weeks, occasions have arise week after week in which small things have caused me to stumble in my walk with God. Someone would say a comment which would set off my emotions, and before I knew it, my emotions were leading me astray down the path of sin. After the incident, I felt terrible. I had failed the test. I had let God down. I had inhibited God’s endless teachings to guide me down the correct path. I was a terrible representative for God.

Over the weekend, I was listening to a preacher who was talking about actively living each day for God. We need to be constantly meditating on Scripture and should be proactive in our lives. We need to be ready for situations and act before our emotions take hold of us. I thought about this teaching over and over again and decided I should try to be more proactive in my life. The very first test would be a trip to the lab to get blood draw.

Yesterday, I arrived at the lab for my blood work. I consciously kept thinking about God and about ways to show God I loved Him. At the forefront of my mind the verse, “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Leviticus 19:18) remained constant. I checked in for my blood work and waited. When the lab technician called me back, a woman was at the lab front door trying to enter. The elderly woman had medical equipment and a mobility device. Although the lab technician was waiting for me, I decided to travel in the opposite direction to the front door and hold open the door for the woman. Once the woman was safely inside the lab, I then headed back toward the lab technician to get my blood work done.

While entering my information into the computer, the lab technician asked me about where I was on the lung transplant list. I knew at once, the woman was making a simple mistake. She assumed since I used a ventilator I must have bad lungs. A lung transplant would remedy my breathing issues. Although this may be true for some people, for me, my lungs are fine. I need a ventilator because my breathing muscles are weak. Getting a lung transplant will not improve my breathing issues.

I could have tried to explain to the lab technician she was mistaken. I did not need a lung transplant. But I have learned in the past, correcting someone’s lack of medical knowledge makes the person feel bad. So, instead, I chose my words carefully and said, “I am not eligible for a lung transplant.” This statement is 100% correct. I am not eligible for a lung transplant because my lungs are not the issue. You do not do a lung transplant on someone who has functioning lungs. But, this statement allowed the lab technician to feel as though what she assumed about my health was not errineous. The woman told me she was sorry I was not eligible to get a lung transplant. The situation passed without anyone’s feelings being hurt.

When I left the lab, I turned a corner to exit the building. An elderly man was shuffling along pushing a walker. I asked the man if he was going to the lab. He said he was. I swung around and opened the door for the man. He thanked me for my kindness.

For the rest of the day, I thought about everything which happened at the clinic. And for once, I did not feel terrible about anything which transpired. Instead, I was happy I was able to love my neighbor as myself to three different people. I smiled and thought perhaps I may have passed today’s tasks.

The Long Road to Recovery

Two weeks ago, my mom underwent surgery to repair and replace two discs in her neck. My mom had been having excruciating pain in her neck, back, arms and head for five months. Imaging suggested one disc in her neck had degenerated; another disc was ruptured. Surgery was needed.

After my mom had the procedure, the doctor said my mom’s neck was a mess. It was much WORSE than what the imaging indicated. Both discs were almost completely gone. It was bone on top of bone grinding against each other. Moreover, without the discs present, all the nerves exiting my mom’s spinal column at those two locations were being crushed by the vertebra.

Since surgery, my mom has been on the slow road to recovery. First, she had to recover from the surgery. Now, as her body is healing, her nerves are flaring up. Everything which was being compressed is now trying to heal. The biggest challenge are the nerves in her right arm.

After two weeks of recovery, I am happy to report my mom is starting to be able to do things on her own. Today, she was able to take a shower, she took a short walk and she is able to sit for short periods of time out of bed. I smile as I witness each milestone. The body’s ability to heal is such a miracle.

 

America: The Land of Great People

The last two weeks have been a whirlwind. I traveled with my mom many, many miles to comfort her as she under went a major surgery on her neck. The days on the road were long and filled with lots of traffic. When it felt as though we could not travel any farther, our destination to stop for the night appeared on the highway.

When we stopped, people were quick to assist our party. A gentleman saw my medical equipment and offered to help. He lifted my wheelchair out of the van. He was so sweet and kind. He felt honored he could assisted us.

At another location, our bellhop cart refused to move in the forward direction. A woman in the parking lot sprang into action and lugged the cart all the way into the hotel and even got it all the way to our hotel floor. I was stunned and amazed someone would go so far out of her way to help us. And the story of America’s kindness continues from hotel to hotel and from hospital to gas station.

The media likes to portray this country as one of division and filled with animosity. But the reality is this nation still stands on one of the Bible’s greatest teachings: “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Leviticus 19:18).

Happy Birthday America. May your kindness and generosity continue for another 245 years.