For the last couple years, I have made it a habit to not make friends with individuals who have chronic medical conditions similar to my own. Folks with Mitochondrial Disease and associated conditions such as Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, Mast Cell Activation Syndrome, gastroparesis, etc., all seem to have a commonality--anyone I meet with these conditions usually passes away. I stopped making friends when it seemed month after month, I would lose another dearly loved friend. My heart is too fragile. I just cannot handle the grief.
Today, I read on a Facebook group about a woman emotionally struggling with her medical conditons. I did a very bad, impulsive thing—I messaged the person on Facebook. I usually do not get involved in others' lives, but I was so moved. Now, I fear, I might have made another friend with Mitochondrial Disease. This, in itself, is not a bad thing, but I am not sure I am ready to possibly endure more heartache. Despite my concerns, it seems God had prearranged this date from the beginning of time.
A few hours after messaging this woman, I see a post on Facebook that another one of my dear Mitochondrial Disease warriors passed away today. My eyes swell with tears; my breath catches in my throat. "Oh LORD, when will this all end? When will my heart stop breaking?" But I go on, "Thank You for sending another sweet soul into my life. Although my love may seem limited, I know Yours is infinite. I know I draw on Your love to keep on giving to others. May we all find comfort in Your arms. May Your love, mercy and grace carry us through each day--through the times of joy and through the times of sorrow. May we all look forward to that day, 'and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away' (Revelation 21:4). Amen."
In loving memory of Jaquie Beckwith
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